While for some people, summer hasn't even started yet (my parents, for example, who are both teachers in Austria, still have one more week to work before starting their summer vacation), I feel like summer's definitely coming to an end for me. I just got back from a 5-day vacation in Spain with my sister (lots of sun, ocean but not that great food...at least not a lot of Vegetarian food at the hotel we were staying at, especially since I also don't eat fish) and now it's one more week, then one week of vacation with my parents and my sister in Italy and then back to the US and very soon, back to training. Okay, not that soon...training starts on July 21st for us (yeah, we start very early) so that's not "that soon" but it's less than a month....
I'm having a bit of a harder time not thinking about work anymore. There's a book I should really read, a residential curriculum that needs to be revised, lesson plans for my Group Leadership course designed (at least the details...we get the drafts from the coordinator of the course and I've already taught it last year, so I have some more experience this time around) and and and. I'm beginning to dread it a little...and I wish I had started earlier. It feels like I'll be pretty busy with work for the next few weeks and I'm not looking forward to that - I had hoped to enjoy the last few weeks of my vacation relaxing at the lake and hanging out with friends. Well, I may be doing both this weekend. My three best friends are coming and staying for two nights. We haven't made any definite plans yet but going down to the lake will probably be part of that. Then, next week - while my parents are at work - I'll have to force myself to sit down and look at some of those books and documents that I've been avoiding all summer.
It's weird...during the year I'm such a workaholic but once I stop, I really stop and then I have a terribly hard time getting back into the swing of things. During the year, I stay up late and work on things - I have more fun revising a lesson plan for work than hanging out with colleagues sometimes - but then I'm on vacation and I just want to do nothing...or at least nothing that relates to work. I've been re-reading Harry Potter. ;) My family makes fun of me...they say I should know by now how the books end. But they're just so fabulous. I still start to cry when some of my favorite characters get hurt. Fabulous writing!!!!
Okay, I'm off to read some more Harry Potter and then it's time for bed because tomorrow starts my fun weekend with my friends. :) And soon after that I'll hopefully have some news on how preparations for work are coming along.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Being on vacation
We all know I'm a workaholic but if you'd been hanging out with me in the last few weeks, you wouldn't recognize me. I started the vacation with lots of good intention in terms of getting ahead with work, reading some books for work that I should have read a long time ago...but now I've been in Austria for almost a month and I've barely done anything. Maybe it's being so far away from work, maybe I just needed a break, or maybe there are just too many distractions. I haven't even been that busy though - there's been plenty of times when I was sitting around wondering what I could do and even being bored - but work still didn't come to my mind.
So for all you workaholics out there: take some time off, get far far away from work and just don't do anything. It's possible, even for someone like us!!!
I'll probably regret not having done anything when I get back but I'd rather not think about that right now. Instead I'll tell you about the fun things that have been keeping me busy lately:
1) My three best friends and I spent some time together. The four of us met in Innsbruck for a couple days, where we celebrated birthdays and one of the girl's boyfriend getting his doctorate degree. Then, I went to visit one of them in Munich.
2) Family: I visited my grandparents, who live on the other side of Austria. I'm definitely done with riding the train...yeah, it may sound like fun for Americans who haven't taken the train very often, but let me tell you: It's NOT! The seats aren't all that comfortable. And on the ride back I got stuck with a group of middle school students, who were returning from a field trip...and they were just rude and obnoxious and annoying. I'm usually not that impatient but there was something about those kids and being stuck in a train for so many hours...
Anyway, unfortunately my parents and my sister are working, but whenever my parents have some time off (and if the weather's nice), we've been trying to do something. Today, my mom and I went hiking; tomorrow afternoon my dad and I will probably do something.
3) Sports: I've never been a huge fan of sports but I do go running occasionally and have tortured myself with the random "work-out DVD" in an attempt to lose some weight and get in shape. I'm trying to keep that up while I'm here and it's been working out pretty well. I've been doing at least "something" every day since I've gotten home.
4) Obsessions: There are a few things I'm obsessed with and during the school year I never have enough time to truly live out my obsessions. So I'm using this time as much as I can....
and here's a list of some of those obsessions:
a) Uwe Kröger: Okay, so most of you may not know him and I'm sorry...because that's really a huge loss. :) Uwe is a fabulous singer and has played the leads in a variety of musicals from Starlight Express to Les Miserables to Beauty and the Beast, Phantom of the Opera and famous Austrian shows such as "Elisabeth" and "Rebecca." I had my dad tape a show with him, "Musical Showstar 2008" and some evenings (like tonight) I just watch one YouTube video of him after the other. He was voted Germany's best musical star seven or eight times. Check him out at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sYhvA-BmSCU&feature=related.
b) Harry Potter: I tried to read a couple other books (for example, Barack Obama's Dreams from my Father, which was great and then a few German books...some good, some not so fabulous) but in the end, I just had to get back to Harry Potter. I can't help it; I've read the books ten or more times but they're just so wonderful.
Okay, now you know my two darkest secrets...my Uwe and my Harry obsessions.
I hope you're all having a fabulous summer!
So for all you workaholics out there: take some time off, get far far away from work and just don't do anything. It's possible, even for someone like us!!!
I'll probably regret not having done anything when I get back but I'd rather not think about that right now. Instead I'll tell you about the fun things that have been keeping me busy lately:
1) My three best friends and I spent some time together. The four of us met in Innsbruck for a couple days, where we celebrated birthdays and one of the girl's boyfriend getting his doctorate degree. Then, I went to visit one of them in Munich.
2) Family: I visited my grandparents, who live on the other side of Austria. I'm definitely done with riding the train...yeah, it may sound like fun for Americans who haven't taken the train very often, but let me tell you: It's NOT! The seats aren't all that comfortable. And on the ride back I got stuck with a group of middle school students, who were returning from a field trip...and they were just rude and obnoxious and annoying. I'm usually not that impatient but there was something about those kids and being stuck in a train for so many hours...
Anyway, unfortunately my parents and my sister are working, but whenever my parents have some time off (and if the weather's nice), we've been trying to do something. Today, my mom and I went hiking; tomorrow afternoon my dad and I will probably do something.
3) Sports: I've never been a huge fan of sports but I do go running occasionally and have tortured myself with the random "work-out DVD" in an attempt to lose some weight and get in shape. I'm trying to keep that up while I'm here and it's been working out pretty well. I've been doing at least "something" every day since I've gotten home.
4) Obsessions: There are a few things I'm obsessed with and during the school year I never have enough time to truly live out my obsessions. So I'm using this time as much as I can....
and here's a list of some of those obsessions:
a) Uwe Kröger: Okay, so most of you may not know him and I'm sorry...because that's really a huge loss. :) Uwe is a fabulous singer and has played the leads in a variety of musicals from Starlight Express to Les Miserables to Beauty and the Beast, Phantom of the Opera and famous Austrian shows such as "Elisabeth" and "Rebecca." I had my dad tape a show with him, "Musical Showstar 2008" and some evenings (like tonight) I just watch one YouTube video of him after the other. He was voted Germany's best musical star seven or eight times. Check him out at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sYhvA-BmSCU&feature=related.
b) Harry Potter: I tried to read a couple other books (for example, Barack Obama's Dreams from my Father, which was great and then a few German books...some good, some not so fabulous) but in the end, I just had to get back to Harry Potter. I can't help it; I've read the books ten or more times but they're just so wonderful.
Okay, now you know my two darkest secrets...my Uwe and my Harry obsessions.
I hope you're all having a fabulous summer!
Friday, June 6, 2008
On life-altering moments
People often ask me why I "choose" to move to the US. That's a tough question. I'm not sure if I ever truly "choose" to move there. It just kind of happened.
I guess it all started with going on vacation to the US. My family travels a lot; my parents are both teachers so we used the summer vacations to explore different countries. We used to have an RV, but after we sold that (after ten years and lots of car trouble in the last few years), we decided to fly and that's when we ended up in the US...twice! I also wasn't all that happy in my high school; I really couldn't see myself making it through junior and senior year at that school. So it was either try to skip a year and graduate early (which I didn't want to do because I didn't want to leave my friends in my class), switch schools (again, not an option because I didn't want to leave my friends), or study abroad (which, granted, meant leaving my friends for a year but I knew I'd be back in the same class with them my senior year.
Studying abroad led to going to undergrad in the US; I quickly got sucked into ResLife (being an RA for three years and an Orientation Leader for one summer; active in RHA and NRHH), suddenly realized you could do that for a career, applied for grad school and you know the rest.
But did I really ever "choose" to move to the US? It's not like I sat down and said, "Yes, I will spend the rest of my life in the US." It was more a series of events, or "life-altering moments" that led to the move. Not that I realized, at the time, that those were "life-altering moments." It was more seemingly unimportant little decisions: picking a spot for our family vacation, trying to get a job at college to pay for room and board, needing something to do for the summer, etc.
Now I can't imagine moving back to Austria; my life, my carreer - everything is in the US. I still miss my family and friends (I have the three most amazing friends from high school) but I wouldn't know what to do here. I catch myself not "fitting" into the culture here, not knowing how to do things (e.g. not bringing a shopping bag to the store...here, if you don't bring your own bag, you have to buy one...a nice way of forcing people not to waste plastic bags but to re-use them...great idea but it sucks when you stand at the counter and realize you don't have a bag with you and have to cram all the chocolate you just bought into the pockets of your jacket). I'm sure I could get used to the life over here again pretty quickly, but would I be happy? Am I happy in the US though?
Tough questions. I'm not sure I know the answers. Sometimes I feel like I'm just drifting along in my life: after high school, I went to college because that was the next step (granted, I went to a different country which was a little out of the ordinary but it was still college), then I went to graduate school because it was the next step, I applied for a job in my field of studies because it was the next step. But now, what's the next step now? Apply for another job? Try to move higher in my career? Try to find a partner and start a family? But is that really what I want or is it just "the next step?"
And what are those "seemingly unimportant decisions" that will later turn out to be "life-altering moments." It'd be nice to know because then I could spend just a little more time thinking about them as I make them.
I guess it all started with going on vacation to the US. My family travels a lot; my parents are both teachers so we used the summer vacations to explore different countries. We used to have an RV, but after we sold that (after ten years and lots of car trouble in the last few years), we decided to fly and that's when we ended up in the US...twice! I also wasn't all that happy in my high school; I really couldn't see myself making it through junior and senior year at that school. So it was either try to skip a year and graduate early (which I didn't want to do because I didn't want to leave my friends in my class), switch schools (again, not an option because I didn't want to leave my friends), or study abroad (which, granted, meant leaving my friends for a year but I knew I'd be back in the same class with them my senior year.
Studying abroad led to going to undergrad in the US; I quickly got sucked into ResLife (being an RA for three years and an Orientation Leader for one summer; active in RHA and NRHH), suddenly realized you could do that for a career, applied for grad school and you know the rest.
But did I really ever "choose" to move to the US? It's not like I sat down and said, "Yes, I will spend the rest of my life in the US." It was more a series of events, or "life-altering moments" that led to the move. Not that I realized, at the time, that those were "life-altering moments." It was more seemingly unimportant little decisions: picking a spot for our family vacation, trying to get a job at college to pay for room and board, needing something to do for the summer, etc.
Now I can't imagine moving back to Austria; my life, my carreer - everything is in the US. I still miss my family and friends (I have the three most amazing friends from high school) but I wouldn't know what to do here. I catch myself not "fitting" into the culture here, not knowing how to do things (e.g. not bringing a shopping bag to the store...here, if you don't bring your own bag, you have to buy one...a nice way of forcing people not to waste plastic bags but to re-use them...great idea but it sucks when you stand at the counter and realize you don't have a bag with you and have to cram all the chocolate you just bought into the pockets of your jacket). I'm sure I could get used to the life over here again pretty quickly, but would I be happy? Am I happy in the US though?
Tough questions. I'm not sure I know the answers. Sometimes I feel like I'm just drifting along in my life: after high school, I went to college because that was the next step (granted, I went to a different country which was a little out of the ordinary but it was still college), then I went to graduate school because it was the next step, I applied for a job in my field of studies because it was the next step. But now, what's the next step now? Apply for another job? Try to move higher in my career? Try to find a partner and start a family? But is that really what I want or is it just "the next step?"
And what are those "seemingly unimportant decisions" that will later turn out to be "life-altering moments." It'd be nice to know because then I could spend just a little more time thinking about them as I make them.
Saturday, May 31, 2008
School's out...
I'm in Austria, visiting my family. This is the first time in seven years that I haven't worked in the summer. Crazy! It's weird to not be working. It's even weirder since summer housing is in my building this year; so I know there's people in my building right now. There's another staff member running summer housing. I know she'll do great, but I'm glad I'm not there to see what's going on. Somehow it's still "my" building!
I'm a little jealous of everyone who's working Orientation this summer. I know several of the Orientation leaders pretty well and would have loved working with them. And I always had a weak spot for Orientation. But I figured, how many more years will I have a 10-month contract and the option to take the summer off...I should take advantage of that.
Being at home is weird. Do you ever feel like you turn into your 16-year-old self whenever you enter the house of your parents? I still feel like that misunderstood, stubborn teenager from back then. I'm still expected to go to bed early, to eat all meals with the and to tell my parents when I go somewhere. My friend and I wanted to drive to Switzerland to watch "Sex and the City" in English - they only show it in German in our hometown - and the movie theatre in Switzerland is only an hour and a half away...okay, maybe a little crazy but the German translation of the Sex and the City shows was bad enough...we didn't want to watch the movie in the translated version. Anyway, of course my parents thought that was crazy and we would only be "allowed" to do so if we're using my friend's car. Thank god she has a car! I hate not having a car. I feel trapped. I barely ever use my car at school, but it's just nice to know that you can get away whenever you want. Here I have a bike...oh joy! Every chance of getting the hell away is connected to physical labor....
I have to admit that I brougt some work home with me; I haven't touched it yet but really should. I got this assessment grant last year to do some studies (a pre- and post-test for my living learning community and a few focus groups...we got money for pizza and prices) and I need to write a summary of the project. It's due in 15 days and I haven't even started yet. I really need to do that....
I also brought some books to read, the binder with all the materials for the course I'm teaching next semester and the textbooks, and my laptop with me. The goal is to be as prepared for next year as possible. Maybe I can make my next year (which will probably also be my last year at my current institution...unless my students convince me to stay for another year which some of them are definitely trying to do)...anyway, hopefully I can make my next year a little less stressful. We'll see.
Okay, our neighbours should be coming over any minute for a little birthday celebration for my mom. Which really just means me having to answer tons of stupid questions and having to listen to why everything American is stupid and I should have stayed in Austria...
Wish me luck!
I'm a little jealous of everyone who's working Orientation this summer. I know several of the Orientation leaders pretty well and would have loved working with them. And I always had a weak spot for Orientation. But I figured, how many more years will I have a 10-month contract and the option to take the summer off...I should take advantage of that.
Being at home is weird. Do you ever feel like you turn into your 16-year-old self whenever you enter the house of your parents? I still feel like that misunderstood, stubborn teenager from back then. I'm still expected to go to bed early, to eat all meals with the and to tell my parents when I go somewhere. My friend and I wanted to drive to Switzerland to watch "Sex and the City" in English - they only show it in German in our hometown - and the movie theatre in Switzerland is only an hour and a half away...okay, maybe a little crazy but the German translation of the Sex and the City shows was bad enough...we didn't want to watch the movie in the translated version. Anyway, of course my parents thought that was crazy and we would only be "allowed" to do so if we're using my friend's car. Thank god she has a car! I hate not having a car. I feel trapped. I barely ever use my car at school, but it's just nice to know that you can get away whenever you want. Here I have a bike...oh joy! Every chance of getting the hell away is connected to physical labor....
I have to admit that I brougt some work home with me; I haven't touched it yet but really should. I got this assessment grant last year to do some studies (a pre- and post-test for my living learning community and a few focus groups...we got money for pizza and prices) and I need to write a summary of the project. It's due in 15 days and I haven't even started yet. I really need to do that....
I also brought some books to read, the binder with all the materials for the course I'm teaching next semester and the textbooks, and my laptop with me. The goal is to be as prepared for next year as possible. Maybe I can make my next year (which will probably also be my last year at my current institution...unless my students convince me to stay for another year which some of them are definitely trying to do)...anyway, hopefully I can make my next year a little less stressful. We'll see.
Okay, our neighbours should be coming over any minute for a little birthday celebration for my mom. Which really just means me having to answer tons of stupid questions and having to listen to why everything American is stupid and I should have stayed in Austria...
Wish me luck!
Friday, May 16, 2008
We've got spirit, yes, we do...
It's been a while...
I'm at the NACURH (National Association of College and University Residence Halls) Conference at Oklahoma State University right now (for you non-ResLifers: RHAs, Residence Hall Associations, send delegations to this conference). I just said goodnight to my students - who are still up playing volleyball - and went back to my room. The first thing I did, of course, was to check my work e-mail to see if I had missed anything. I just can't get rid of some of those workaholic tendencies...haha.
NACURH has been a blast so far. One of my best friends from Undergrad is here, also as an advisor with a delegation. One of my Orientation students, two students who were RAs at my undergrad at the same time I was an RA, one of my former supervisors...it's like a big reunion. :)
One of my students said earlier today, "Stop being so popular." Haha! Student Affairs is a small world. He'll have to get used to it (I'm recruiting him for our profession...it shouldn't be too hard).
I closed my building last week. Of course my students couldn't just leave on a happy note...
The night before the last day of finals, someone pulled a fire alarm at 3:30 am. I felt terribly for all those students, who had been studying like crazy all week and were just trying to get some well-deserved sleep to be rested and ready for their last finals the next day.
And then, closing day, someone left a bag with pop tabs (from beer cans) outside my door and a note that said, "Haha, you didn't catch us, bitch." One of my students also stopped by my office during the last week of classes to tell me that I was the worst hall director ever - simply because I wouldn't move him to another room (newsflash: when he asked, I didn't have any rooms open in my building; a single opened up later on and Housing gave it to him...at our institution only the Housing office can assign singles while we can move students to open spaces in doubles; so I couldn't have moved him to that single).
I guess I don't have to explain that I was very happy when we had checked out the last residents, did our last walk-through of the building and closed the doors for this year. I'm taking the summer off (I have a ten-month position; we have the opportunity to work over the summer but I chose not to do that this year) and am actually going to Austria to visit my family. It'll be good to get away from everything and come back re-energized and ready for another year.
There were also some really good times though and it was tough to say goodbye to some of my students. I will miss this year's staff terribly. One of my graduate assistants graduated (why do they have to do that???); she was amazing and right now I can't imagine running the building without her. I know it'll be okay and my new grad will be fabulous...but saying goodbye was definitely tough. My other grad still has one more year but she was moved to another building. :(
Three of my RAs are returning to my staff (yay!), three will be in different buildings, three are not returning to the RA position next year and one is studying abroad in the Fall. I'll miss them terribly; we've had a fun year and accomplished a lot. We didn't always agree on everything, but overall we came together as a staff and a team and developed close relationships with each other. At least none of them are graduating, so they'll still be around next year (and we will have reunion dinners and such...) and several of them are in NRHH, so I'll definitely get to see them at those meetings.
I also had some very special students this year. There was my "fanclub" which was actually a intramural sports team but they used my name and had t-shirts with my face on it...a little creepy, I know, but also really sweet! Then there were several of my students who really embraced our theme and the idea of being active members of their community; many of them have taken on formal leadership positions for next year with student government or as RAs. It'll be exciting to watch them to continue to grow and become influential leaders in our community.
Three students and I did a "positive art project" two weeks before closing; we had an incident on campus this year of a very offensive art project being displayed. We talked about it in my leadership course and one of the students asked me after that conversation if we could do a "positive art project" to show that many of our students actually value diversity. So we made a big banner with different color handprints, painted the words "Celebrate Diversity" on it and hung it outside our building during finals week. I just really loved that one of my students took the initiative to make this happen.
And then there's my NRHH crew!!! I love them; I really do. One of my RAs will be president next year and I know she'll just be amazing. Our NRHH delegate, who is here at NACURH with me, cracks me up - he's an outstanding student leader and we can have conversations about the most serious topics, but we can also just fool around and have a good time. I like to have a good time.
I know some of my colleagues would say that I'm "too close" with my students and that I should hang out with my students and more with other advisors. But around 10:30 pm the majority of advisors (at least the ones I know) were going to bed while my students were hanging out at the live karaoke and dancing. And if you know me, you know that I will never pass up the opportunity to dance. :)
Okay, I've finished some work-related tasks (we just received our committee chair information the day before we left for NACURH...basically if you want to chair a committee next year, you have to submit a letter by Friday saying what committee you are interested in and why; well, I'm at NACURH and then I'm going home to Austria and will leave right away to spend the weekend in Italy...so really, this interest letter just had to happen tonight...not sure how good it is...we'll see); I've listened to my favorite band, which has become a nightly ritual (Shout-out to "We The Living"...check them out at http://wetheliving.com/); I've checked my personal e-mail and decided to respond to those messages tomorrow; and I've gotten my stuff ready for tomorrow. So now it's time for bed.
For those of you who are still closing your buildings/finishing up last tasks before the end of the school year: good luck with everything. For those of you who're already done, enjoy the summer!
Shout-out to everyone who's here at NACURH right now!!!
I'm at the NACURH (National Association of College and University Residence Halls) Conference at Oklahoma State University right now (for you non-ResLifers: RHAs, Residence Hall Associations, send delegations to this conference). I just said goodnight to my students - who are still up playing volleyball - and went back to my room. The first thing I did, of course, was to check my work e-mail to see if I had missed anything. I just can't get rid of some of those workaholic tendencies...haha.
NACURH has been a blast so far. One of my best friends from Undergrad is here, also as an advisor with a delegation. One of my Orientation students, two students who were RAs at my undergrad at the same time I was an RA, one of my former supervisors...it's like a big reunion. :)
One of my students said earlier today, "Stop being so popular." Haha! Student Affairs is a small world. He'll have to get used to it (I'm recruiting him for our profession...it shouldn't be too hard).
I closed my building last week. Of course my students couldn't just leave on a happy note...
The night before the last day of finals, someone pulled a fire alarm at 3:30 am. I felt terribly for all those students, who had been studying like crazy all week and were just trying to get some well-deserved sleep to be rested and ready for their last finals the next day.
And then, closing day, someone left a bag with pop tabs (from beer cans) outside my door and a note that said, "Haha, you didn't catch us, bitch." One of my students also stopped by my office during the last week of classes to tell me that I was the worst hall director ever - simply because I wouldn't move him to another room (newsflash: when he asked, I didn't have any rooms open in my building; a single opened up later on and Housing gave it to him...at our institution only the Housing office can assign singles while we can move students to open spaces in doubles; so I couldn't have moved him to that single).
I guess I don't have to explain that I was very happy when we had checked out the last residents, did our last walk-through of the building and closed the doors for this year. I'm taking the summer off (I have a ten-month position; we have the opportunity to work over the summer but I chose not to do that this year) and am actually going to Austria to visit my family. It'll be good to get away from everything and come back re-energized and ready for another year.
There were also some really good times though and it was tough to say goodbye to some of my students. I will miss this year's staff terribly. One of my graduate assistants graduated (why do they have to do that???); she was amazing and right now I can't imagine running the building without her. I know it'll be okay and my new grad will be fabulous...but saying goodbye was definitely tough. My other grad still has one more year but she was moved to another building. :(
Three of my RAs are returning to my staff (yay!), three will be in different buildings, three are not returning to the RA position next year and one is studying abroad in the Fall. I'll miss them terribly; we've had a fun year and accomplished a lot. We didn't always agree on everything, but overall we came together as a staff and a team and developed close relationships with each other. At least none of them are graduating, so they'll still be around next year (and we will have reunion dinners and such...) and several of them are in NRHH, so I'll definitely get to see them at those meetings.
I also had some very special students this year. There was my "fanclub" which was actually a intramural sports team but they used my name and had t-shirts with my face on it...a little creepy, I know, but also really sweet! Then there were several of my students who really embraced our theme and the idea of being active members of their community; many of them have taken on formal leadership positions for next year with student government or as RAs. It'll be exciting to watch them to continue to grow and become influential leaders in our community.
Three students and I did a "positive art project" two weeks before closing; we had an incident on campus this year of a very offensive art project being displayed. We talked about it in my leadership course and one of the students asked me after that conversation if we could do a "positive art project" to show that many of our students actually value diversity. So we made a big banner with different color handprints, painted the words "Celebrate Diversity" on it and hung it outside our building during finals week. I just really loved that one of my students took the initiative to make this happen.
And then there's my NRHH crew!!! I love them; I really do. One of my RAs will be president next year and I know she'll just be amazing. Our NRHH delegate, who is here at NACURH with me, cracks me up - he's an outstanding student leader and we can have conversations about the most serious topics, but we can also just fool around and have a good time. I like to have a good time.
I know some of my colleagues would say that I'm "too close" with my students and that I should hang out with my students and more with other advisors. But around 10:30 pm the majority of advisors (at least the ones I know) were going to bed while my students were hanging out at the live karaoke and dancing. And if you know me, you know that I will never pass up the opportunity to dance. :)
Okay, I've finished some work-related tasks (we just received our committee chair information the day before we left for NACURH...basically if you want to chair a committee next year, you have to submit a letter by Friday saying what committee you are interested in and why; well, I'm at NACURH and then I'm going home to Austria and will leave right away to spend the weekend in Italy...so really, this interest letter just had to happen tonight...not sure how good it is...we'll see); I've listened to my favorite band, which has become a nightly ritual (Shout-out to "We The Living"...check them out at http://wetheliving.com/); I've checked my personal e-mail and decided to respond to those messages tomorrow; and I've gotten my stuff ready for tomorrow. So now it's time for bed.
For those of you who are still closing your buildings/finishing up last tasks before the end of the school year: good luck with everything. For those of you who're already done, enjoy the summer!
Shout-out to everyone who's here at NACURH right now!!!
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
When it rains, it pours.
I haven't been feeling well for the past few days. I have the flu, I think, and absolutely no time to spend all day in bed and relax. But if I'm up for more than few hours, I feel like I'm burning out, I'm short of breath and I start feeling dizzy.
I don't like being sick. When you're sick, you realize how alone you are. I was stretched out on my couch last night, really not feeling all that great, and terribly thirsty. But there was nobody to go to the fridge and get iced tea for me. And even though it's just in the next room, it cost me a lot of energy to get it myself. :( Those are the moments when you truly miss your mom, who used to spoil you when you were sick. Where are the days when you could just call for your mom and she'd bring you tea and soup or anything you asked for? Being sick wasn't so bad when you got out of school and were getting spoiled at home. Now, when you still have to work and have to get everything yourself, being sick really isn't fun.
Anyway, as if this wasn't enough: I was watching TV and had started dozing off, when I heard two male voices and a lot of movement outside my door. I knew something was wrong, but nothing prepared me for that...
As I opened my door, I saw a trash can that had been dragged in from outside and dumped out right outside my apartment door. On the floor was some weird brown fluid/mess and I saw a guy running down the hallway pulling up his pants (use your own imagination to figure out what happened). His friend was rushing out the other door. Half asleep and only seeing the back of them, I really couldn't tell who they were. I didn't have my keys on me or shoes on or was in the right physical condition to chase after them. So there was nothing left to do but call the police and file a report. Then, I tried to call emergency maintenance because I was NOT going to clean up that mess myself. And it started to smell, so there was no chance of me going to bed with that smell right outside my apartment. Of course, our Emergency Maintenance service didn't pick up the phone. So much for "emergency" maintenance...I guess you're only allowed to have emergencies during work hours. Finally, a police officer came over to help me clean up.
And of course, one of my residents had been sitting in the Lobby and must have seen something (or at least the guy running away) but was insisting that she hadn't seen anything. As if!!!
I e-mailed my supervisor before I went to sleep to let him know what happened. So the next morning, I expected there to be an e-mail or a voicemail checking in with me and making sure I was okay. I mean, that isn't too much to ask for, right? But nothing. A few hours later, I got an e-mail from my supervisor about a stupid meeting we were having that day; still no comment on the whole incident. Finally, that afternoon after the meeting, which was regarding something completely different, he asked what had happened last night. But to be honest, at this point, it was too late...because I was already frustrated. I mean, we talk so much about ensuring our students' safety, but has anyone ever thought about the staff's safety?
I guess the mature thing would have been to say something to my supervisor at this time; to express that I wasn't feeling supported or that I had hoped for a different and faster reaction. But what's the point in telling people that you want them to care about you and your well-being? Even if they express their concern then, it won't feel genuine because you had to ask them to do it first; and you'll still feel as alone and will still question if anyone cares.
It's like this Fall, when a mother made assumptions about my sexual orientation and told me that "nobody should have to live with a person like me." When I told my supervisors about this incident, they said that I did the right thing by telling this woman that we didn't move anyone based on their sexual orientation and backed me up on that decision; but nobody ever checked in with me to make sure I was okay or that I was feeling safe.
I guess I should have known when I went into this profession that things like this would happen. And I can handle it. It'd just be nice to get a phone call after an incident like that and have your supervisor say something like, "I'm sorry this happened to you. Are you okay?" It'd just make me feel like people in this department actually care about me and how I'm doing.
I don't like being sick. When you're sick, you realize how alone you are. I was stretched out on my couch last night, really not feeling all that great, and terribly thirsty. But there was nobody to go to the fridge and get iced tea for me. And even though it's just in the next room, it cost me a lot of energy to get it myself. :( Those are the moments when you truly miss your mom, who used to spoil you when you were sick. Where are the days when you could just call for your mom and she'd bring you tea and soup or anything you asked for? Being sick wasn't so bad when you got out of school and were getting spoiled at home. Now, when you still have to work and have to get everything yourself, being sick really isn't fun.
Anyway, as if this wasn't enough: I was watching TV and had started dozing off, when I heard two male voices and a lot of movement outside my door. I knew something was wrong, but nothing prepared me for that...
As I opened my door, I saw a trash can that had been dragged in from outside and dumped out right outside my apartment door. On the floor was some weird brown fluid/mess and I saw a guy running down the hallway pulling up his pants (use your own imagination to figure out what happened). His friend was rushing out the other door. Half asleep and only seeing the back of them, I really couldn't tell who they were. I didn't have my keys on me or shoes on or was in the right physical condition to chase after them. So there was nothing left to do but call the police and file a report. Then, I tried to call emergency maintenance because I was NOT going to clean up that mess myself. And it started to smell, so there was no chance of me going to bed with that smell right outside my apartment. Of course, our Emergency Maintenance service didn't pick up the phone. So much for "emergency" maintenance...I guess you're only allowed to have emergencies during work hours. Finally, a police officer came over to help me clean up.
And of course, one of my residents had been sitting in the Lobby and must have seen something (or at least the guy running away) but was insisting that she hadn't seen anything. As if!!!
I e-mailed my supervisor before I went to sleep to let him know what happened. So the next morning, I expected there to be an e-mail or a voicemail checking in with me and making sure I was okay. I mean, that isn't too much to ask for, right? But nothing. A few hours later, I got an e-mail from my supervisor about a stupid meeting we were having that day; still no comment on the whole incident. Finally, that afternoon after the meeting, which was regarding something completely different, he asked what had happened last night. But to be honest, at this point, it was too late...because I was already frustrated. I mean, we talk so much about ensuring our students' safety, but has anyone ever thought about the staff's safety?
I guess the mature thing would have been to say something to my supervisor at this time; to express that I wasn't feeling supported or that I had hoped for a different and faster reaction. But what's the point in telling people that you want them to care about you and your well-being? Even if they express their concern then, it won't feel genuine because you had to ask them to do it first; and you'll still feel as alone and will still question if anyone cares.
It's like this Fall, when a mother made assumptions about my sexual orientation and told me that "nobody should have to live with a person like me." When I told my supervisors about this incident, they said that I did the right thing by telling this woman that we didn't move anyone based on their sexual orientation and backed me up on that decision; but nobody ever checked in with me to make sure I was okay or that I was feeling safe.
I guess I should have known when I went into this profession that things like this would happen. And I can handle it. It'd just be nice to get a phone call after an incident like that and have your supervisor say something like, "I'm sorry this happened to you. Are you okay?" It'd just make me feel like people in this department actually care about me and how I'm doing.
Friday, April 25, 2008
On feeling "old" and being lonely
One of my graduate assistants is graduating in two weeks and is job searching. Today, in our evaluation meeting, she talked about how she can't believe that she is really done with school and will have a "real job" next year. And I thought that I can't believe that I've had a "real job" for two years already.
It's like mood swings...some days I can't believe that I'm a "grown-up" and have a "real job;" other days I just feel old and I am "afraid that I met the [person] of my dreams at a dry cleaner or something and I was just too busy to notice." (quote from movie "Fools Rush In")
When I was little, I thought I would be married at 26; I thought I'd have at least one if not two kids by now. Instead, I'm single, living in a residence hall, working 24/7, spending my Friday nights watching a romantic comedy and eating ice cream. What a life, right? And sadly enough, I don't really see this changing any time soon. I mean, living in a small town and always being busy with work, I really don't meet many people, who are not students or colleagues. And we all know that there aren't that many heterosexual, single men in Student Affairs.
I guess it's just one of those nights when I feel lonely and old.
On the job front, there isn't much new. Our annual reports are due on Monday. I actually turned mine in already. These reports are supposed to cover everthing that we did this year and give a new, incoming staff member all the resources they may need to manage our building and run the living learning community. That's a lot of information to cover, don't you think?
I know I'm a lengthy writer and maybe I put in some things that aren't necessary. But I don't expect a new staff member to read every single sentence. I try to organize the report, so they can glance through the table of contents, pick the section that relates to what they're trying to do, and then go through those resources. I also believe in including attachments and other documents that this person, if he/she wants to could utilize (with minor alterations). Again, if he/she decided to redo everthing, that's fine. But if he/she doesn't want to reinvent the wheel, everything should be there, right?
Okay, so I finished my report and the actual report is about 50 pages plus about 100 pages of attachments and other documents. I know that's a lot longer than what everyone else has. But do people really have to make fun of me for it? If it's too long, maybe my supervisor should tell me that and work with me to see what sections could be cut. But why make jokes and laught at me? It just gets frustrating and annoying. No wonder I live in the "CHANGE" (the name of my LLC) bubble and try to venture out as little as possible. Within my bubble, I'm safe.
I guess I'm just feeling lonely tonight. I've been more homesick these past two years working here than I ever was when I first came to the US for college. But back then, I had friends. Now, I have staff members, who I love hanging out with but can't be with 24/7 because after all they are students and I'm their supervisor; I have colleagues, who - for whatever reason - don't care about me and don't understand me; and I have three amazing friends, who live a 10-hour flight away.
Okay, enough feeling bad for myself. It's time for bed because I have a lot of work to do tomorrow (yes, on a Saturday).
It's like mood swings...some days I can't believe that I'm a "grown-up" and have a "real job;" other days I just feel old and I am "afraid that I met the [person] of my dreams at a dry cleaner or something and I was just too busy to notice." (quote from movie "Fools Rush In")
When I was little, I thought I would be married at 26; I thought I'd have at least one if not two kids by now. Instead, I'm single, living in a residence hall, working 24/7, spending my Friday nights watching a romantic comedy and eating ice cream. What a life, right? And sadly enough, I don't really see this changing any time soon. I mean, living in a small town and always being busy with work, I really don't meet many people, who are not students or colleagues. And we all know that there aren't that many heterosexual, single men in Student Affairs.
I guess it's just one of those nights when I feel lonely and old.
On the job front, there isn't much new. Our annual reports are due on Monday. I actually turned mine in already. These reports are supposed to cover everthing that we did this year and give a new, incoming staff member all the resources they may need to manage our building and run the living learning community. That's a lot of information to cover, don't you think?
I know I'm a lengthy writer and maybe I put in some things that aren't necessary. But I don't expect a new staff member to read every single sentence. I try to organize the report, so they can glance through the table of contents, pick the section that relates to what they're trying to do, and then go through those resources. I also believe in including attachments and other documents that this person, if he/she wants to could utilize (with minor alterations). Again, if he/she decided to redo everthing, that's fine. But if he/she doesn't want to reinvent the wheel, everything should be there, right?
Okay, so I finished my report and the actual report is about 50 pages plus about 100 pages of attachments and other documents. I know that's a lot longer than what everyone else has. But do people really have to make fun of me for it? If it's too long, maybe my supervisor should tell me that and work with me to see what sections could be cut. But why make jokes and laught at me? It just gets frustrating and annoying. No wonder I live in the "CHANGE" (the name of my LLC) bubble and try to venture out as little as possible. Within my bubble, I'm safe.
I guess I'm just feeling lonely tonight. I've been more homesick these past two years working here than I ever was when I first came to the US for college. But back then, I had friends. Now, I have staff members, who I love hanging out with but can't be with 24/7 because after all they are students and I'm their supervisor; I have colleagues, who - for whatever reason - don't care about me and don't understand me; and I have three amazing friends, who live a 10-hour flight away.
Okay, enough feeling bad for myself. It's time for bed because I have a lot of work to do tomorrow (yes, on a Saturday).
Saturday, April 12, 2008
On national conventions and getting older
Last week, I went to ACPA. I have to say, these national conventions get better every year - maybe not the actual convention but my experiences attending them. It's probably just that each year, I get to know more people, I become more involved, and suddenly I get more out of attending conventions.
I remember my first convention. I felt completely lost. I knew maybe two or three people who were there. I went to sessions - some of which were great, some of which were decent, and some where I didn't feel like I learned much - I barely talked to anyone. I felt like a little fish in a big sea.
Now, four years later, I have become involved in a commission, I presented a program, I met up with friends from grad school, I knew colleagues from various institutions, I learned a lot and I had a good time.
So for those of you who may feel lost at national conventions, here's my advice: get involved. Find a standing committee or commission (or a knowledge community for NASPA) and get involved. Suddenly you will know people, you will have things to do at the convention to the point where you're busy and really have to work out your schedule to be able to attend a few valuable sessions.
On a very different note: My birthday is on Tuesday. I'm not really looking forward to it. Birthdays have all these high expectations attached to them - like it is supposed to be a special day just because you're getting older. And when you are an ocean away from your family and your three best friends and hundreds of miles from any other friends, you know your expectations will just be disappointed. I don't even have any plans this year.
My sister's birthday present for me was a dinner or movie with a friend and I can't think of anyone I want to go with. There's one colleague I could ask. I'm not sure.
I like my job; it's a great entry-level position and a fabulous learning experience. But I know that for my next job search, I will have to change my priorities and make sure that I'm moving to an area where I have friends or where there are things to do for me - places I can go and ways I can meet people.
I remember my first convention. I felt completely lost. I knew maybe two or three people who were there. I went to sessions - some of which were great, some of which were decent, and some where I didn't feel like I learned much - I barely talked to anyone. I felt like a little fish in a big sea.
Now, four years later, I have become involved in a commission, I presented a program, I met up with friends from grad school, I knew colleagues from various institutions, I learned a lot and I had a good time.
So for those of you who may feel lost at national conventions, here's my advice: get involved. Find a standing committee or commission (or a knowledge community for NASPA) and get involved. Suddenly you will know people, you will have things to do at the convention to the point where you're busy and really have to work out your schedule to be able to attend a few valuable sessions.
On a very different note: My birthday is on Tuesday. I'm not really looking forward to it. Birthdays have all these high expectations attached to them - like it is supposed to be a special day just because you're getting older. And when you are an ocean away from your family and your three best friends and hundreds of miles from any other friends, you know your expectations will just be disappointed. I don't even have any plans this year.
My sister's birthday present for me was a dinner or movie with a friend and I can't think of anyone I want to go with. There's one colleague I could ask. I'm not sure.
I like my job; it's a great entry-level position and a fabulous learning experience. But I know that for my next job search, I will have to change my priorities and make sure that I'm moving to an area where I have friends or where there are things to do for me - places I can go and ways I can meet people.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
On the ups and downs of Spring Break Service Trips
Spring Break is over and the countdown toward the end of the year and the closing of the residence hall has started. As much as I love my job and my students, I have to admit, I love closing. By that time of the year, I'm just ready to finish it - ready to get everyone out of the building - ready to have a little bit more of a social life again - ready to be done, take a break and then get a fresh start with a new staff and a new group of residents.
But before I start dreaming about the future, let's take a look back to the past week - Spring Break. In September, I had this "awesome" idea to go on a service trip with my residents. It sounded great! What better way to put our theme - "CHANGE - Emerging Community Leaders" - into action and help our residents achieve some of those learning outcomes we have.
It all sounded great until maybe two weeks prior to the trip. I didn't really have the time earlier to get things ready for the trip, so suddenly I was hit with all these last minute preparations. From communicating with the Habitat for Humanity (HFH) host affilitate and figuring details about our accommodations and other arrangements with them to preparing some team builders and service learning activities to buying supplies for the group (work gloves, coolers, etc.) and myself (e.g. steel toed shoes).
I was running around like crazy and while I didn't want to admit it to myself, I really wished that I had never come up with the idea for this trip and would just get to spend spring break staying at home, relaxing, maybe reading a book or watching TV, or even using a day or two to catch up and maybe even get ahead with work...sleeping in late...oh, it all sounded so tempting!
Looking back: the trip was worth it. I had a good time. The students gained a lot from it. The HFH affiliate really appreciated our help. And we had tons of fun - at our days off when we went to Philadelphia and Washington D.C. as well as at the construction site when we learned how to "flush" "4-by-2's" and build a wall.
Part of me still wishes that I would have had that week off. This week back - it's only been three days but it feels like a lifetime again - has been superbusy. With ACPA coming up in addition to all the building-related and committee-related tasks I need to accomplish, I've been putting in lots of late hours.
Some of my RAs and I talked about whether or not we'd want to do a trip like that again. And the RAs strongly felt like we should do it again next year. I agree with them - but I'm also hesitant to give up my spring break again. It's tough. I want to do this for my students - as well as for myself - but is all the stress really worth it?
I know it is - at least I believe it is - but the self-ish part of me wishes I could just sleep in for a couple days. :)
But before I start dreaming about the future, let's take a look back to the past week - Spring Break. In September, I had this "awesome" idea to go on a service trip with my residents. It sounded great! What better way to put our theme - "CHANGE - Emerging Community Leaders" - into action and help our residents achieve some of those learning outcomes we have.
It all sounded great until maybe two weeks prior to the trip. I didn't really have the time earlier to get things ready for the trip, so suddenly I was hit with all these last minute preparations. From communicating with the Habitat for Humanity (HFH) host affilitate and figuring details about our accommodations and other arrangements with them to preparing some team builders and service learning activities to buying supplies for the group (work gloves, coolers, etc.) and myself (e.g. steel toed shoes).
I was running around like crazy and while I didn't want to admit it to myself, I really wished that I had never come up with the idea for this trip and would just get to spend spring break staying at home, relaxing, maybe reading a book or watching TV, or even using a day or two to catch up and maybe even get ahead with work...sleeping in late...oh, it all sounded so tempting!
Looking back: the trip was worth it. I had a good time. The students gained a lot from it. The HFH affiliate really appreciated our help. And we had tons of fun - at our days off when we went to Philadelphia and Washington D.C. as well as at the construction site when we learned how to "flush" "4-by-2's" and build a wall.
Part of me still wishes that I would have had that week off. This week back - it's only been three days but it feels like a lifetime again - has been superbusy. With ACPA coming up in addition to all the building-related and committee-related tasks I need to accomplish, I've been putting in lots of late hours.
Some of my RAs and I talked about whether or not we'd want to do a trip like that again. And the RAs strongly felt like we should do it again next year. I agree with them - but I'm also hesitant to give up my spring break again. It's tough. I want to do this for my students - as well as for myself - but is all the stress really worth it?
I know it is - at least I believe it is - but the self-ish part of me wishes I could just sleep in for a couple days. :)
Thursday, March 13, 2008
On students' stupidity, professional development and the goodness of my heart
What a day!
I broke up a party. No, that's not right. I walked in on the aftermath of a party. I was walking through the hall - knowing that a lot of partying and drinking would be going on today. On my first round, a few rooms stood out to me as rooms we should keep an eye on. I decided to walk through one of my male corridors again (their RA was out of town, so I figured the corridor may need a little more attention). That time, as I'm walking through, a student exits the room. He barely open the door, squeezed through and was clearly trying to block me from being able to look into the room. It couldn't have been any more obvious. He also reeked off alcohol.
After that, I just went into "ResLife routine" - asking him to open the door, getting the students' IDs, having them take out (and recycle!) the empty cans and bottles (there was over 50), asking them to dump out the rest of the alcohol (another 20 cans/bottles).
But here's the thing: for one of the students, this may be his third alcohol violation. We have a policy here that states that if you're found responsible for your third violation, you will be, at minimum, suspended for one semester.
I've worked in ResLife long enough to realize that I did what I had to do and that it was the student, who put himself into this situation. But that's what I just don't get. After you were found responsible for two violations and knowing what the policy is, WHY would you put yourself in that situation??? Especially on a weekend where you know more staff is around because there are traditionally more alcohol incidents. I mean, I realize that for some students alcohol is part of the college experience, but is it really worth risking your chance to continue going to college??? I mean, seriously, don't be stupid!!!
Another interesting aspect of my day was a conversation I had with a central staff member about professional development. I've been struggling with figuring out how I could continue working on my professional development. I am going to conferences regularly; I'm involved in some committees at my institution as well as through national organizations. But it feels like there's something missing. I don't feel like I'm doing enough to challenge myself, to continue learning. I've asked my supervisor for feedback, but didn't get much concrete suggestions on what I can work on. Everyone tells me I'm doing a good job. But there has to be more, right?
Maybe I just need to commit more time to reading articles and books on my own. I don't know. But there has to be something else that I can do.
Last but not least, let me tell you a story of what happens when you have these "great" ideas and decide to do things out of the "goodness of your heart." Last Fall, my staff and I talked about how "cool" it would be if we organized a service trip for residents in our building over Spring Break. Well, I'm the type of person, who - once we've come up with an idea - follows through and makes it happen. So I did. And now, in two days, I'm leaving on our trip.
I'm not ready. I haven't had time to think about things I need to buy and bring, packing, figuring out directions and other details, organizing evening events, and and and. And part of me wishes I could just spend the break sleeping in, reading, relaxing and doing nothing.
I know I'll have fun once we're on the road, but right now, I'm not all that thrilled about going and about all the things I still have to organize.
Talking about that, I should get going. Wish me luck!
I broke up a party. No, that's not right. I walked in on the aftermath of a party. I was walking through the hall - knowing that a lot of partying and drinking would be going on today. On my first round, a few rooms stood out to me as rooms we should keep an eye on. I decided to walk through one of my male corridors again (their RA was out of town, so I figured the corridor may need a little more attention). That time, as I'm walking through, a student exits the room. He barely open the door, squeezed through and was clearly trying to block me from being able to look into the room. It couldn't have been any more obvious. He also reeked off alcohol.
After that, I just went into "ResLife routine" - asking him to open the door, getting the students' IDs, having them take out (and recycle!) the empty cans and bottles (there was over 50), asking them to dump out the rest of the alcohol (another 20 cans/bottles).
But here's the thing: for one of the students, this may be his third alcohol violation. We have a policy here that states that if you're found responsible for your third violation, you will be, at minimum, suspended for one semester.
I've worked in ResLife long enough to realize that I did what I had to do and that it was the student, who put himself into this situation. But that's what I just don't get. After you were found responsible for two violations and knowing what the policy is, WHY would you put yourself in that situation??? Especially on a weekend where you know more staff is around because there are traditionally more alcohol incidents. I mean, I realize that for some students alcohol is part of the college experience, but is it really worth risking your chance to continue going to college??? I mean, seriously, don't be stupid!!!
Another interesting aspect of my day was a conversation I had with a central staff member about professional development. I've been struggling with figuring out how I could continue working on my professional development. I am going to conferences regularly; I'm involved in some committees at my institution as well as through national organizations. But it feels like there's something missing. I don't feel like I'm doing enough to challenge myself, to continue learning. I've asked my supervisor for feedback, but didn't get much concrete suggestions on what I can work on. Everyone tells me I'm doing a good job. But there has to be more, right?
Maybe I just need to commit more time to reading articles and books on my own. I don't know. But there has to be something else that I can do.
Last but not least, let me tell you a story of what happens when you have these "great" ideas and decide to do things out of the "goodness of your heart." Last Fall, my staff and I talked about how "cool" it would be if we organized a service trip for residents in our building over Spring Break. Well, I'm the type of person, who - once we've come up with an idea - follows through and makes it happen. So I did. And now, in two days, I'm leaving on our trip.
I'm not ready. I haven't had time to think about things I need to buy and bring, packing, figuring out directions and other details, organizing evening events, and and and. And part of me wishes I could just spend the break sleeping in, reading, relaxing and doing nothing.
I know I'll have fun once we're on the road, but right now, I'm not all that thrilled about going and about all the things I still have to organize.
Talking about that, I should get going. Wish me luck!
Saturday, March 8, 2008
On Technology
Last week, my laptop stopped working; well, it just won't charge anymore. At first, it still worked if I pushed the cord in far enough and wiggled it around a bit, but then it completely stopped working. Resigned, I decided to go to BestBuy and see what could be done to fix it.
Now I've only had my laptop for a year. Officially I got one, so I could use it for conferences. In reality, I wanted a laptop, so I could sit on my couch and watch TV while getting some work done or maybe talking to friends online. In the past year, my laptop has become more and more important in my daily routine. Initially, I would bring it out on weekends; then I started using it occasionally during the week. Soon I would turn on my laptop the second I left the office in the evening and spend the rest of the day checking e-mail, chatting online, surfing the internet and playing sudoku.
I was obviously aware that I used my laptop a lot, but I didn't realize how "addicted" I was until I didn't have it anymore. This past week hasn't been easy. It started last weekend: I had to do evaluations for the graduate students we interviewed. The evaluations were due Monday at 8 am. Faced with the choice to either sit in my office for hours and write evals or sit on my couch, watching TV while doing it, I picked the second option. But without a laptop that meant writing all the evaluations by hand. Now I'm not anti-writing by hand, but when I write fast, I don't have the nicest handwriting. Would everyone be able to read it? Probably not. So I spent some painful hours trying to write very nicely. And because I had procrastinated all weekend, I found myself staying up almost all of Sunday night in a desperate attempt to get all the evals done by the deadline.
The rest of the week wasn't any easier. When I left work at night, I couldn't do much without my laptop - I really had to leave work. "Good for you," you may say. "Stop being such a workaholic!" Well, yes, maybe that was a good thing. But I also didn't get much done this week. Toward the end of the week I realized that I'd fallen behind in several aspects of my job and decided to spend some extra hours in the office. I also haven't e-mailed any of my friends in a while and I just now (at 1:30 am on a Saturday night/Sunday morning) updating this blog.
How did I survive without a laptop before???
Now I've only had my laptop for a year. Officially I got one, so I could use it for conferences. In reality, I wanted a laptop, so I could sit on my couch and watch TV while getting some work done or maybe talking to friends online. In the past year, my laptop has become more and more important in my daily routine. Initially, I would bring it out on weekends; then I started using it occasionally during the week. Soon I would turn on my laptop the second I left the office in the evening and spend the rest of the day checking e-mail, chatting online, surfing the internet and playing sudoku.
I was obviously aware that I used my laptop a lot, but I didn't realize how "addicted" I was until I didn't have it anymore. This past week hasn't been easy. It started last weekend: I had to do evaluations for the graduate students we interviewed. The evaluations were due Monday at 8 am. Faced with the choice to either sit in my office for hours and write evals or sit on my couch, watching TV while doing it, I picked the second option. But without a laptop that meant writing all the evaluations by hand. Now I'm not anti-writing by hand, but when I write fast, I don't have the nicest handwriting. Would everyone be able to read it? Probably not. So I spent some painful hours trying to write very nicely. And because I had procrastinated all weekend, I found myself staying up almost all of Sunday night in a desperate attempt to get all the evals done by the deadline.
The rest of the week wasn't any easier. When I left work at night, I couldn't do much without my laptop - I really had to leave work. "Good for you," you may say. "Stop being such a workaholic!" Well, yes, maybe that was a good thing. But I also didn't get much done this week. Toward the end of the week I realized that I'd fallen behind in several aspects of my job and decided to spend some extra hours in the office. I also haven't e-mailed any of my friends in a while and I just now (at 1:30 am on a Saturday night/Sunday morning) updating this blog.
How did I survive without a laptop before???
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
On a real conversation and a life outside work
Last week, we had a band playing in my building. This new band had contacted me because they were doing a national college tour to promote their music and wanted to perform in my building. I like music and I've always had a thing for new artists...I just like supporting them and helping them as they're starting off. So of course I couldn't say no to this new band, especially after I listened to their music and really liked it.
Anyway, so this band came to my building. We had a pretty bad snowstorm that day and they were a little delayed. I thought, "Yay, everyone will be in the building and they'll love to come to our concert." Not so much. Sometimes I just don't understand my residents. Who says no to a free concert? But many of them did, so the crowd in the basement was pretty thin. I felt bad for the band, but I soon forgot all about that because I was just absolutely enjoying myself. I loved their music. And they were really nice, fun guys.
Three of my RAs and I invited them to come to one of our dining halls with us after the concert. We went, had food and just sat there and laughed and joked. It was AMAZING!
So since that concert, I've been obsessed with this new band - much to the amusement of my colleagues and friends.
But here's the thing: The music was great; the guys were really nice. But you also have to think about what's been going on in my life. I haven't had an entire weekend off since the beginning of the semester. I hung out with some colleagues occassionally, obviously spent lots of time to with my RAs and my students, but I hadn't hung out with anyone, who doesn't have anything to do with our university or Student Affairs, since winter break. And it was SO NICE! Just talking about non-work related things; having a normal conversation with guys, who have no idea what I do day in and day out. I didn't realize how much I missed it until I suddenly had this unexpected opportunity for a real conversation. It almost felt like I had a life outside work again. Hmmm, maybe I should try to do things like this more often....
Anyway, so this band came to my building. We had a pretty bad snowstorm that day and they were a little delayed. I thought, "Yay, everyone will be in the building and they'll love to come to our concert." Not so much. Sometimes I just don't understand my residents. Who says no to a free concert? But many of them did, so the crowd in the basement was pretty thin. I felt bad for the band, but I soon forgot all about that because I was just absolutely enjoying myself. I loved their music. And they were really nice, fun guys.
Three of my RAs and I invited them to come to one of our dining halls with us after the concert. We went, had food and just sat there and laughed and joked. It was AMAZING!
So since that concert, I've been obsessed with this new band - much to the amusement of my colleagues and friends.
But here's the thing: The music was great; the guys were really nice. But you also have to think about what's been going on in my life. I haven't had an entire weekend off since the beginning of the semester. I hung out with some colleagues occassionally, obviously spent lots of time to with my RAs and my students, but I hadn't hung out with anyone, who doesn't have anything to do with our university or Student Affairs, since winter break. And it was SO NICE! Just talking about non-work related things; having a normal conversation with guys, who have no idea what I do day in and day out. I didn't realize how much I missed it until I suddenly had this unexpected opportunity for a real conversation. It almost felt like I had a life outside work again. Hmmm, maybe I should try to do things like this more often....
Friday, February 8, 2008
A job or a leadership position?
It's been an interesting week with lots of follow-up conversations with RAs and my grads. Overall, I think many of those 1-on-1 conversations have been helpful. Some have been eye-opening, not necessarily in a positive sense. For example, one RA wanted to argue with me over why we charged lock-out fees. He felt that he should be able to make that determination himself whether or not he wants to charge someone. You know, I'm not a fan of this lock-out policy either (I don't have any better suggestions either though), but if it's a policy and we as a staff agree to do it, then we also have to follow-through. Otherwise some RAs are the "mean" ones who charge residents and the other ones become the "cool" RAs, and that's just not fair!
After lots of reflection, I feel like it comes down to the big question: Is the RA position a job or a leadership position?
If you ask me, I'd say it's both. You have to treat it like a job: complete assignments on tasks, follow instructions, be on time, enforce policies that you personally may not always agree with, etc. Then, there's the leadership position aspect of having developmental conversations with your supervisor, pushing yourself to take it to the next level, making connections with residents, learning yourself and so on.
Looking through the position through just one lens (the job or the leadership position) just doesn't work.
But unfortunately, I feel like that's what a lot of my staff members have been doing lately. They use the "I was talking to a resident" line as an excuse for not getting administrative tasks done on time. Don't get me wrong: I love that they want to connect with residents and get to know them, but there's some other basic things that just need to happen. And in general, I feel like I'm much too lenient with those things anyway, giving second and third chances when things are turned in late, discussing with students how they can work on their time management and and and. What else do they want me to do?
But I think my staff and I are getting back on the right track. My grads and I came up with an activity for our meeting on Sunday. We will continue to discuss issues in 1-on-1's.
Please keep your fingers crossed for me that the meeting on Sunday goes over well. :)
After lots of reflection, I feel like it comes down to the big question: Is the RA position a job or a leadership position?
If you ask me, I'd say it's both. You have to treat it like a job: complete assignments on tasks, follow instructions, be on time, enforce policies that you personally may not always agree with, etc. Then, there's the leadership position aspect of having developmental conversations with your supervisor, pushing yourself to take it to the next level, making connections with residents, learning yourself and so on.
Looking through the position through just one lens (the job or the leadership position) just doesn't work.
But unfortunately, I feel like that's what a lot of my staff members have been doing lately. They use the "I was talking to a resident" line as an excuse for not getting administrative tasks done on time. Don't get me wrong: I love that they want to connect with residents and get to know them, but there's some other basic things that just need to happen. And in general, I feel like I'm much too lenient with those things anyway, giving second and third chances when things are turned in late, discussing with students how they can work on their time management and and and. What else do they want me to do?
But I think my staff and I are getting back on the right track. My grads and I came up with an activity for our meeting on Sunday. We will continue to discuss issues in 1-on-1's.
Please keep your fingers crossed for me that the meeting on Sunday goes over well. :)
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
What just happened?
My staff and I participated in this "Improv Training" study. Basically, it was all about using the ideas behind improv (attitude of acceptance, no negativing, for the good of the group) to improv how we work together as a team. The training was long (3 hrs.) but the staff, in spite of not having been excited about going to it at first, actually enjoyed it and said they got something out of it.
The following staff meeting, I decided to talk about staff expectations. I felt that, as a staff, we had hit the "spring slump" where overall everything's still going okay but little things are starting to slide and staff members are losing motivation and drive. I had also heard some concerns from staff members about other staff members not following through on some tasks (e.g. collecting lock-out money, doing rounds when on duty).
The discussion started off pretty good. My grads and I challenged the staff to dig deeper into what their expectations were. For example, we didn't want them to just say that they wanted "respect," we wanted them to elaborate on what it means to show respect, what would be some actions that would show one staff member that another staff member is respecting them.
We started and I was happy with people's comments and how they were questioning and challenging each other. Of course, there were a few who said things like "why don't we just say 'open-minded'...it's all the same anyway" but I didn't feel like that was the overall attitude.
One of the staff members brough up the issue of "tolerance" vs. "acceptance" in an attempt to challenge us to move more toward acceptance. Some were having a hard time understanding the difference. There were some very obvious non-verbal cues showing that people didn't care or weren't paying attention anymore. The staff (and I was so proud of her for that!) pointed this out and from there on, it all went downhill.
Two days later, I still can't really explain what happened.
One staff member questioned why we were even talking about this. How would staff expectations affect our residents?
I tried to explain that some of us not living up to the expectations of the staff did have a negative affect on residents. I gave some examples - and maybe, in the heat of the moment, didn't pick the most significant examples. But we've been having problems with collecting lock-out money. Some staff members have been slacking, which is why we spent the past two weeks hunting down lock-out money (it costs $7.00 here if you lock yourself out) from September and October. Residents were frustrated with us; I spent hours trying to figure out what was even going on with the lock-out money. Granted, I could have paid more attention to it as well. But I guess what really frustrated me was that after I had asked them to start knocking on people's doors (which had been an expectations all along but had not happened), many of them just didn't do it. And they didn't even feel bad about it.
Well, from there everything got out of control. Staff members got defensive. They said things like, "if we are making an impact on someone's life and changing their life, why are we being evaluated on administrative tasks"...I tried to point out that watching football with a group of male residents isn't changing their life. Obviously I appreciate them having positive relationships with their residents, but in the end, we are here to be educators and to teach our residents something...and I know that's not always happening. Some of the RAs have done an amazing job incorporating our learning outcomes into their educational programs and following the curriculum, others have done the bare minimum (e.g. if the task was to organize a team builder with a reflection aspect, some played capture the flag without any follow-up conversation or debriefing).
I know what I just wrote may sound pretty harsh. I don't think I worded at as strongly during the meeting. I know, for a fact, I even said that I was proud of them and what we had accomplished so far and that we could have those conversations of how we could bring it to the next level - but that I wanted to bring it to the next level. That I didn't want to get complacent.
Oooo, that didn't sit well with them. Several staff members said it "hurt their feelings" that I suggested if they were just doing what they'd been doing all along was being complacent.
It was like they thought they were the best RAs on the face of the earth. The ironic part, of course, was that the RAs who thought that were the ones who were the ones slacking off and not taking things seriously.
I guess I got more frustrated than I should have. I probably should have stopped the conversation earlier and continued it in 1-on-1 conversation.
But I still don't understand how they could get offended at me saying that I wanted to take it to the next level?
I think we have accomplished a lot this year. And I'm much more satisfied with how we incorporated the living learning community into daily interactions, events and initiatives. But I think we still have a LONG way to go. I don't think corridor meetings are as effective as they could be - I think they are solely a way of information dissemination and when I tried to include experiential learning activities, not all of the RAs did them with their corridors (some having the dumbest excuses ever...like, 'oh i lost the handout you gave us and forgot that we were supposed to do that....hmmm, and that after we had talked about it for like 10 minutes at a staff meeting).
Anyway, I'm just getting more frustrated again. I think the challenge is how you get that feedback across to RAs, who think they're perfect. There are some, whom I give feedback, and they just shrug it off and I know they're not even going to consider it.
We have invented this "job jar"...if you're late or you miss a deadline, we will ask you to pick up some administrative task. Nobody loves having to pick a task from the job jar, but most of them do it. One of my RAs even, when she forgot something, came running into my office and was like, "okay, where the job jar? Let me pick something," before I could even say something to her. Others have very different reactions, ranging from annoyence to getting defensive when I remind them to pick up a job jar task.
I guess what it comes down to is just their attitude about the position. They've done a pretty good job all year and I just didn't expect several of them to "just not care" and I didn't expect them to be so full of themselves. Maybe I should have seen it coming...already during training, other staffs looked at us and said, "Oh, that staff thinks they're better than everyone else." I just saw the excitement my staff brought to the position and loved it. Somehow, that excitement and passion turned into arrogance.
On a positive note though, at least some of the staff members understood where I was coming from and agreed with my perspectives. Interestingly enough, those were the staff members who had been doing an outstanding job all year.
Okay, enough rambling. I will have to continue to do some damage-control over the next few days and I should probably get some sleep so I'm ready for it.
The following staff meeting, I decided to talk about staff expectations. I felt that, as a staff, we had hit the "spring slump" where overall everything's still going okay but little things are starting to slide and staff members are losing motivation and drive. I had also heard some concerns from staff members about other staff members not following through on some tasks (e.g. collecting lock-out money, doing rounds when on duty).
The discussion started off pretty good. My grads and I challenged the staff to dig deeper into what their expectations were. For example, we didn't want them to just say that they wanted "respect," we wanted them to elaborate on what it means to show respect, what would be some actions that would show one staff member that another staff member is respecting them.
We started and I was happy with people's comments and how they were questioning and challenging each other. Of course, there were a few who said things like "why don't we just say 'open-minded'...it's all the same anyway" but I didn't feel like that was the overall attitude.
One of the staff members brough up the issue of "tolerance" vs. "acceptance" in an attempt to challenge us to move more toward acceptance. Some were having a hard time understanding the difference. There were some very obvious non-verbal cues showing that people didn't care or weren't paying attention anymore. The staff (and I was so proud of her for that!) pointed this out and from there on, it all went downhill.
Two days later, I still can't really explain what happened.
One staff member questioned why we were even talking about this. How would staff expectations affect our residents?
I tried to explain that some of us not living up to the expectations of the staff did have a negative affect on residents. I gave some examples - and maybe, in the heat of the moment, didn't pick the most significant examples. But we've been having problems with collecting lock-out money. Some staff members have been slacking, which is why we spent the past two weeks hunting down lock-out money (it costs $7.00 here if you lock yourself out) from September and October. Residents were frustrated with us; I spent hours trying to figure out what was even going on with the lock-out money. Granted, I could have paid more attention to it as well. But I guess what really frustrated me was that after I had asked them to start knocking on people's doors (which had been an expectations all along but had not happened), many of them just didn't do it. And they didn't even feel bad about it.
Well, from there everything got out of control. Staff members got defensive. They said things like, "if we are making an impact on someone's life and changing their life, why are we being evaluated on administrative tasks"...I tried to point out that watching football with a group of male residents isn't changing their life. Obviously I appreciate them having positive relationships with their residents, but in the end, we are here to be educators and to teach our residents something...and I know that's not always happening. Some of the RAs have done an amazing job incorporating our learning outcomes into their educational programs and following the curriculum, others have done the bare minimum (e.g. if the task was to organize a team builder with a reflection aspect, some played capture the flag without any follow-up conversation or debriefing).
I know what I just wrote may sound pretty harsh. I don't think I worded at as strongly during the meeting. I know, for a fact, I even said that I was proud of them and what we had accomplished so far and that we could have those conversations of how we could bring it to the next level - but that I wanted to bring it to the next level. That I didn't want to get complacent.
Oooo, that didn't sit well with them. Several staff members said it "hurt their feelings" that I suggested if they were just doing what they'd been doing all along was being complacent.
It was like they thought they were the best RAs on the face of the earth. The ironic part, of course, was that the RAs who thought that were the ones who were the ones slacking off and not taking things seriously.
I guess I got more frustrated than I should have. I probably should have stopped the conversation earlier and continued it in 1-on-1 conversation.
But I still don't understand how they could get offended at me saying that I wanted to take it to the next level?
I think we have accomplished a lot this year. And I'm much more satisfied with how we incorporated the living learning community into daily interactions, events and initiatives. But I think we still have a LONG way to go. I don't think corridor meetings are as effective as they could be - I think they are solely a way of information dissemination and when I tried to include experiential learning activities, not all of the RAs did them with their corridors (some having the dumbest excuses ever...like, 'oh i lost the handout you gave us and forgot that we were supposed to do that....hmmm, and that after we had talked about it for like 10 minutes at a staff meeting).
Anyway, I'm just getting more frustrated again. I think the challenge is how you get that feedback across to RAs, who think they're perfect. There are some, whom I give feedback, and they just shrug it off and I know they're not even going to consider it.
We have invented this "job jar"...if you're late or you miss a deadline, we will ask you to pick up some administrative task. Nobody loves having to pick a task from the job jar, but most of them do it. One of my RAs even, when she forgot something, came running into my office and was like, "okay, where the job jar? Let me pick something," before I could even say something to her. Others have very different reactions, ranging from annoyence to getting defensive when I remind them to pick up a job jar task.
I guess what it comes down to is just their attitude about the position. They've done a pretty good job all year and I just didn't expect several of them to "just not care" and I didn't expect them to be so full of themselves. Maybe I should have seen it coming...already during training, other staffs looked at us and said, "Oh, that staff thinks they're better than everyone else." I just saw the excitement my staff brought to the position and loved it. Somehow, that excitement and passion turned into arrogance.
On a positive note though, at least some of the staff members understood where I was coming from and agreed with my perspectives. Interestingly enough, those were the staff members who had been doing an outstanding job all year.
Okay, enough rambling. I will have to continue to do some damage-control over the next few days and I should probably get some sleep so I'm ready for it.
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Being a returner
Mood: blah
About a week ago, we had to submit our letters of intent. Tomorrow, we should be finding out where we're placed for next year. It's a big deal here because of our living learning communities. One community is just so different from another; your placement can make or break your experience.
I'm pretty confident that I will get to stay in my current living learning community. I haven't heard about anyone else being interested in it. I think I've done a decent job this year. And I just really don't think I could work anywhere else.
But enough about that: I've been thinking about what it's been like to be a "returner" this year (after all, I need to plan the returner meeting for April, where we'll talk about what it means to be a returner).
It's been nice to know the job. I wasn't nervous or anxious about new tasks (even though I would have never admitted that I was nervous last year). I was able to make some changes in my community. I could try out some new things with my staff.
In terms of my relationships with new staff? Well, during training and at the beginning of the semester, I always felt like I should be doing more, reaching out to them more, giving more advice. But when I tried, I often felt like they didn't necessarily want that advice, so I cut back and only answered when asked or when there was a bigger issue. I tried to be positive around them as not to taint their opinion of our institution and department from the very begining. But I also didn't want to lie. And when we were asked for feedback in team meetings, I was honest and mentioned the things that were frustrating me. That was tough at times because I felt like I was the only one on our team, who'd ever bring up a problem...well, it was me and my grad (also a returner). There was one more returner on the team, but he hardly ever says anything. I'm still struggling with this - knowing when to give feedback or how often. Sometimes it feels like it's a waste of time because nothing will change anything - then sometimes things change but I'm not sure if others like the change or if they dislike me for it (for example when I suggested that we actually do something during team meeting - professional development stuf for example - instead of just having check-ins and getting some basic info from our coordinator).
It'd be really interesting to hear what the other staff members think about me. Was I a "good" returner? Had I been helpful? Were there other things that I could have done?
I have no idea.
Well it's 1:30 a.m....so I should probably try and get some sleep.
Wish me luck for tomorrow (if the letters even come out on time...which, knowing our department, i doubt).
About a week ago, we had to submit our letters of intent. Tomorrow, we should be finding out where we're placed for next year. It's a big deal here because of our living learning communities. One community is just so different from another; your placement can make or break your experience.
I'm pretty confident that I will get to stay in my current living learning community. I haven't heard about anyone else being interested in it. I think I've done a decent job this year. And I just really don't think I could work anywhere else.
But enough about that: I've been thinking about what it's been like to be a "returner" this year (after all, I need to plan the returner meeting for April, where we'll talk about what it means to be a returner).
It's been nice to know the job. I wasn't nervous or anxious about new tasks (even though I would have never admitted that I was nervous last year). I was able to make some changes in my community. I could try out some new things with my staff.
In terms of my relationships with new staff? Well, during training and at the beginning of the semester, I always felt like I should be doing more, reaching out to them more, giving more advice. But when I tried, I often felt like they didn't necessarily want that advice, so I cut back and only answered when asked or when there was a bigger issue. I tried to be positive around them as not to taint their opinion of our institution and department from the very begining. But I also didn't want to lie. And when we were asked for feedback in team meetings, I was honest and mentioned the things that were frustrating me. That was tough at times because I felt like I was the only one on our team, who'd ever bring up a problem...well, it was me and my grad (also a returner). There was one more returner on the team, but he hardly ever says anything. I'm still struggling with this - knowing when to give feedback or how often. Sometimes it feels like it's a waste of time because nothing will change anything - then sometimes things change but I'm not sure if others like the change or if they dislike me for it (for example when I suggested that we actually do something during team meeting - professional development stuf for example - instead of just having check-ins and getting some basic info from our coordinator).
It'd be really interesting to hear what the other staff members think about me. Was I a "good" returner? Had I been helpful? Were there other things that I could have done?
I have no idea.
Well it's 1:30 a.m....so I should probably try and get some sleep.
Wish me luck for tomorrow (if the letters even come out on time...which, knowing our department, i doubt).
Sunday, January 20, 2008
The Trip - Part 2
Hello,
How's it going?
So the rest of the trip is kind of a blurr. Skiing with my family, parties with my friends, visiting grandparents, seeing "Rebecca" (this new musical with Uwe Kroeger and Wietske Van Tongeren) in Vienna, more hanging out with friends, etc. Family life isn't always easy - like so many families, we have our issues and problems - but they're family, you know.
And it was just really nice not being at work or anywhere near work.
It already seems like ages ago.
But here's a few things I learned during this vacation:
1) If we think it's hard to explain to Americans what we, as Student Affairs professionals do, it's nothing compared to explaining it to Austrians. And I think partially it's due to the wealth of different tasks that are part of our job. You may be able to explain one, but it'd take you forever to explain everything...and nobody wants to listen for that long.
2) Things change but they're not different.
Okay, that probably makes no sense. But here's what I mean: If you've gone from a place for four years, you think that everything will be different. But when you get there, some things may have changed - there's new buildings, people have moved - but in the end, it still feels the same.
3) True friends will always be true friends.
There's people we meet and we think they'll be your friends for life. A few years later, they're gone, no matter how hard you tried to stay in touch. Then there's those people, where - yes, you still have to put some work into staying in touch - but you're not the only one "working." And then you can put oceans between each other, but you'll always be there for each other - and when you get back together, things may have changed, but they're not different. :)
How's it going?
So the rest of the trip is kind of a blurr. Skiing with my family, parties with my friends, visiting grandparents, seeing "Rebecca" (this new musical with Uwe Kroeger and Wietske Van Tongeren) in Vienna, more hanging out with friends, etc. Family life isn't always easy - like so many families, we have our issues and problems - but they're family, you know.
And it was just really nice not being at work or anywhere near work.
It already seems like ages ago.
But here's a few things I learned during this vacation:
1) If we think it's hard to explain to Americans what we, as Student Affairs professionals do, it's nothing compared to explaining it to Austrians. And I think partially it's due to the wealth of different tasks that are part of our job. You may be able to explain one, but it'd take you forever to explain everything...and nobody wants to listen for that long.
2) Things change but they're not different.
Okay, that probably makes no sense. But here's what I mean: If you've gone from a place for four years, you think that everything will be different. But when you get there, some things may have changed - there's new buildings, people have moved - but in the end, it still feels the same.
3) True friends will always be true friends.
There's people we meet and we think they'll be your friends for life. A few years later, they're gone, no matter how hard you tried to stay in touch. Then there's those people, where - yes, you still have to put some work into staying in touch - but you're not the only one "working." And then you can put oceans between each other, but you'll always be there for each other - and when you get back together, things may have changed, but they're not different. :)
Saturday, January 12, 2008
The Trip - Part 1
Hello everyone,
I apologize for not having blogged in so long. I actually went back home to Austria to visit my family - for the first time in FOUR years. And then, less than a week ago (even though it feels like an eternity already) I returned to the US and have been swamped with work.
But let's start from the beginning.
When I went to Austria, I had to apply for a new visa since my old one had expired. In case you are not as familiar with immigration laws (which I definitely wouldn't be if I wasn't in this situation myself): You just need to have a valid work permit (in my case my H1B) to live and work in the US. However, to enter the country, you need a visa. If it expires while you're in the country, it doesn't matter...as long as that work permit is still valid. But if you leave the country and want to re-enter it, you need a new visa. Does that make sense?
To make a long story short, my visa had expired. I needed to get a new one (which you can only do in your country of citizenship).
I was definitely a little nervous about the whole process - even though I tried to deny those feelings in a hope of not making it worse. Not that there is really a reason why my visa application could have been denied, but you never know. And if I hadn't gotten the visa, I would suddenly have been unemployed, homeless and back in a country where Student Affairs doesn't even exist.
I flew to Munich, Germany, one of the closest airports to my hometown Bregenz in Austria. But instead of going home, I took the train to Vienna. The next morning was my appointment at the Consulate.
I tried to patiently wait in line. Ahead of me was a woman, who worked at some company in Boston, a man who was teaching at MIT, an older couple, and a young student. One after the other, we were called up to hand in our documents. Then, we were called - again one by one - for a brief interview. All the others ahead of me were just asked a few questions and were then told that their visa was approved and would be sent to them within the next few days.
I was starting to feel a bit more confident.
But then, when it was finally my turn, I was called over to a little more private interview area. Already not a good sign, I thought. Now I was just trying not to let myself freak out. The employee from the Consulate asked me how long I had been in the U.S. Then, he asked if I had applied for immigration status - or if anyone else had applied for me. I felt like he didn't believe me when I said that I had not applied (because I don't qualify for it...but I didn't tell him that). He asked a couple more questions about what I do; then he asked for my fingerprints. At this point, I was so nervous that when he said he needed my right hand, I put the left hand on the machine. Finally - after what seemed like an eternity - he said, "Well, we will have to check your records and look further into that. If we have any further questions, we will contact you and asked you to come in again."
My heart must have stopped for a second. I don't know how I managed to smile, say thank you, and walk out the door. I spent the next few hours trying to calm myself down and telling myself that everything would be okay. Hey, at least I had a lot of time to calm myself down since I was - once again - sitting in train and would be for 9 hours to get home.
Surprisingly enough, just a few days later, my passport with my new visa arrived in the mail. I didn't even know what to say when I got it.
I apologize for not having blogged in so long. I actually went back home to Austria to visit my family - for the first time in FOUR years. And then, less than a week ago (even though it feels like an eternity already) I returned to the US and have been swamped with work.
But let's start from the beginning.
When I went to Austria, I had to apply for a new visa since my old one had expired. In case you are not as familiar with immigration laws (which I definitely wouldn't be if I wasn't in this situation myself): You just need to have a valid work permit (in my case my H1B) to live and work in the US. However, to enter the country, you need a visa. If it expires while you're in the country, it doesn't matter...as long as that work permit is still valid. But if you leave the country and want to re-enter it, you need a new visa. Does that make sense?
To make a long story short, my visa had expired. I needed to get a new one (which you can only do in your country of citizenship).
I was definitely a little nervous about the whole process - even though I tried to deny those feelings in a hope of not making it worse. Not that there is really a reason why my visa application could have been denied, but you never know. And if I hadn't gotten the visa, I would suddenly have been unemployed, homeless and back in a country where Student Affairs doesn't even exist.
I flew to Munich, Germany, one of the closest airports to my hometown Bregenz in Austria. But instead of going home, I took the train to Vienna. The next morning was my appointment at the Consulate.
I tried to patiently wait in line. Ahead of me was a woman, who worked at some company in Boston, a man who was teaching at MIT, an older couple, and a young student. One after the other, we were called up to hand in our documents. Then, we were called - again one by one - for a brief interview. All the others ahead of me were just asked a few questions and were then told that their visa was approved and would be sent to them within the next few days.
I was starting to feel a bit more confident.
But then, when it was finally my turn, I was called over to a little more private interview area. Already not a good sign, I thought. Now I was just trying not to let myself freak out. The employee from the Consulate asked me how long I had been in the U.S. Then, he asked if I had applied for immigration status - or if anyone else had applied for me. I felt like he didn't believe me when I said that I had not applied (because I don't qualify for it...but I didn't tell him that). He asked a couple more questions about what I do; then he asked for my fingerprints. At this point, I was so nervous that when he said he needed my right hand, I put the left hand on the machine. Finally - after what seemed like an eternity - he said, "Well, we will have to check your records and look further into that. If we have any further questions, we will contact you and asked you to come in again."
My heart must have stopped for a second. I don't know how I managed to smile, say thank you, and walk out the door. I spent the next few hours trying to calm myself down and telling myself that everything would be okay. Hey, at least I had a lot of time to calm myself down since I was - once again - sitting in train and would be for 9 hours to get home.
Surprisingly enough, just a few days later, my passport with my new visa arrived in the mail. I didn't even know what to say when I got it.
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